Lesson 15: Suicide is Never the Answer

We live in a small town and news travels fast here.  Recently we heard that a student at our local high school committed suicide.  We did not know this boy, but from what I have seen he was active in sports, had lots of friends and seemed like a very "normal" teenager.  Unfortunately, his parents were the ones who found him and I can't imagine the absolute heart break that they must be feeling.

This is clearly a tough subject and one that I would prefer my girls didn't have to know about, but we thought it presented an opportunity to have an open, honest discussion with our daughters.

We asked them if they could think of any reason why this boy would think that the best answer was to take his own life.  We talked about things that might cause angst in a teenager's life.  The worst case scenario that my girls could come up with is if their entire family were to be killed.  While this would certainly be devastating, we talked about other things as well.  A break-up with a boyfriend, a fight with a friend, failing a test, not fitting it, disappointing your family, even abuse of some kind. 

We asked them what they would do if they were feeling any of these things and were feeling like their life were not worth living.  I was happy to see that they understand the power of communication.  They suggested talking to us, to each other, to a friend, a teacher, an aunt or uncle, any other trusted adult. 

We asked them what they would do if a friend told them that they were thinking of suicide.  Their immediate reaction was that they would tell an adult.  This is the perfect answer, but we also told them to take that person seriously.  We told them to not leave them alone and if they couldn't get to an adult immediately that they could talk to them, go see a movie, play a game, tell them to talk to a parent, call 911....anything to get them to realize that things could get better and to encourage them to get help.

As parents, we have tried to instill in our children that their lives have value.  We told them in no uncertain terms that suicide is NEVER the answer.  We also assured them that they will have crappy days and times in their lives when they feel like their life is miserable.  I wish this weren't true, but it most likely is.

My thoughts and prayers go out to the family of this young boy and all of those who loved him.

Lesson 15:  Suicide is never the answer